As the cost of living crisis means people are struggling to budget, experts say it’s important than ever for women to have a secret savings account.

Having a personal pot of cash set aside can give women opportunity to walk away from difficult situations – from a bad job to an unsafe relationship.

Personal finance expert Ruwani Hewa told the Daily Mail: ‘An emergency fund is a set amount of money stashed away for unexpected events or surprise expenses. Most importantly, it gives you options in times of stress or crisis, such as if you’ve lost your job, been suddenly admitted to hospital or had something major happen.

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‘However, it’s not money to help you keep the boiler on, as it can also give you a lot of freedom and added security, particularly if you need to leave a difficult relationship or navigate a big life change of any kind.’

Vix Leyton, consumer expert at thinkmoney, added: ‘Money doesn’t fix everything, but it buys you options, and sometimes that safety net means the difference between staying and leaving.

‘A “break glass” emergency fund isn’t a luxury, it can be a lifeline. In the honeymoon period of a relationship, it’s hard to imagine being trapped, but it is a reality many are facing every day, to love is to trust and to trust makes you vulnerable.

‘Leaving takes courage, but it also takes cash; Rent, deposits, childcare, even a replacement phone or safe transport all cost money, and when every penny already has a job, that barrier can keep people locked into situations where they no longer feel safe, or even simply when they’re no longer happy.’

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Here, finance experts revealed their top tips for building a secret account, sharing different methods and options for saving money.

How to build up your secret savings account

According to personal finance expert Ruwani Hewa, of Starling Bank, the general rule of thumb for an emergency fund is to save at least three months’ worth of essential living expenses, covering the costs of your rent or mortgage, bills and food.

‘So if this is typically £1,000 a month for you, then you should aim to build up at least £3,000,’ she said.

She acknowledged that this can sound like a ‘daunting task at first’, noting that it ‘can add a whole other type of saving to your budget or savings goals’.

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‘Sometimes the hardest part of trying to save can be figuring out how much you can afford to set aside – too much and you feel like you’re stripping away too much of the fun stuff, but too little can make it feel like you’re having to save for eternity with no end in sight,’ Ruwani said.

She added that as with any other saving goal, people should focus on saving for an emergency fund in a way that works for them.

Ruwani continued: ‘It’s crucial to note that many costs that consumers face are at or near all time highs through the cost of living crisis, whether this is your rent or mortgage, bills, or food.

‘With this in mind, focus on saving what you can, where you can, particularly as focusing on saving smaller amounts on a frequent basis is typically effective than saving lump sums on occasion.’

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She recommends adopting practical money habits, like creating a budget, as this can help show where money can be saved.

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‘No matter how much you’re able to put aside on a monthly basis, saving for a specific purpose like your emergency fund can really help you to commit,’ said Ruwani.

‘You can also take advantage of tools such as round-ups, as this lets you save without even lifting a finger.

‘This works by rounding up all of your spending to the nearest pound and saving the difference, so if you’re buying a coffee for £2.50, your bank will take £3 out of your current account and automatically put 50p into your emergency fund.

‘While the 50p may seem like nothing compared to your bigger savings goal, it can really add up in the long run.’

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Meanwhile, IE Hub’s budget expert Gemma Cryan told the Daily Mail that having an emergency fund isn’t just about financial security, it’s about freedom and safety.

‘For many women, money can be the deciding factor in whether they can leave an unsafe or unhealthy relationship,’ she said.

She acknowledged that it may feel ‘impossible’ to save money during a cost-of-living crisis, but noted that ‘small, consistent steps make a real difference’.

‘An emergency fund is a safety net,’ Gemma said. ‘It gives you control, options, and peace of mind when you need it most.’

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Sharing her top five tips for building an emergency fund, she said: ‘ Start small and stay consistent.

‘Even setting aside £5–£10 a week builds momentum. Over time, small amounts grow and form a habit of saving.’

Next, she recommended people track their spending, using resources like IE Hub’s free budgeting tools to see where money goes, to identify areas to cut back.

Gemma then suggested people automate their savings, by setting up a standing order that pays money into a separate savings account each payday.

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Next, she said people should review their subscriptions and bills, cancelling those that are unused, and switching to better deals on utilities or insurance.

Any savings made here should be directly diverted to the emergency fund.

Finally, she said: ‘Seek support if needed. Charities, employers, or community schemes sometimes offer hardship grants or matched savings – take advantage where possible.’

Gemma concluded: ‘An emergency fund provides the means to act quickly, secure accommodation, and cover essential costs without relying on anyone else.

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In difficult situations, financial independence can be life-changing – and even life-saving.’

And Starling Bank’s Ruwani Hewa agreed, adding: ‘An emergency fund doesn’t just serve as a financial buffer, but it can also serve as an important boost to your emotional wellbeing and financial resilience.

‘They allow you to have peace of mind and to be safe in the knowledge that you can resolve a situation to the best of your ability, rather than worrying about whether you can afford to deal with it at all.’

Meanwhile, thinkmoney’s Vix Leyton noted that there has been a ‘small but vital change’ to support victims recently.

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She explained: ‘Survivors of domestic abuse no longer have to pay the £300-plus fee to apply for a Persons at Risk of Violence (PARV) order – something they previously needed to stop their address being listed publicly when applying for a Debt Relief Order. It’s progress, and it matters.

‘But the best approach to managing unforeseen risk starts long before that point. One of the most common ways financial control takes root is through convenience. Letting a partner “handle the money” can be perceived as an act of love, or teamwork, until it quietly becomes a reliance, and worst case scenario, a threat/reason an abuser gives as to why you can’t leave them.

‘Having your own account, understanding what goes in and out each month, and keeping a small sum ring-fenced just for you is the best way to build the confidence that comes with knowing you could walk away at any time.’